Another Poll For American Horror Story Asylum Fans: Favorite Recurring Briarcliff Manor Guest Star – We Wanna Know Your Picks!

OK, I guess Pepper was closer to a guest role on the show than a regular character (as far as screen time), but there was no way I was going to leave her off the “Characters You’ll Miss Most” poll! This time, tell us your favorite–or most memorable– guest in a recurring role, because there were some real  show-stoppers!

And there was  no way we were going to leave Pepper off this list, either. We seriously considered putting in the character of “Spivey” as a “featured rasper”, even thought about adding the alien/s, but a human didn’t portray them.

I’m reasonably certain no last-minute surprises guest spots or cameos are coming up, but with this show you never know, so I’ll re-post if, say, Connie Britton pops up. Also, Spivey may not have been a featured rasper, and I can’t deny or confirm yet if he was the “kitchen rasper”. He was in the premiere, then “Origins of Monstrosity”, but unless he was a featured rasper, for now he’s not in the running.

So vote away! Same rules as “character you’ll miss most” poll – you can vote for up to three choices.

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Horror Boom’s Most Anticipated Horror Movies of 2013 – American Horror Story Asylum Final Episodes (OK, Technically TV In 2013)

The final four episodes of American Horror Story Asylum are a great jumping off point for our Ten Most Anticipated in 2013 list, and the first of the final four acts (The Name Game) is a matter of days away (January 2nd). So, read on about AHSA’s “final four” coming up next.

In a little more than a month, Briarcliff Manor, Sister Jude, Lana, Bloody Face, Sister Mary-Demon-Eunice, and the rest of the characters we’ve gotten attached to (in some cases, despite ourselves) will have gone the way of The Harmon family and the “Murder House.”

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To avoid our explanation of why we cannot wait turning into an novella-length essay, we went with the traditional Horror Boom form when writing about this show: a ten-item list.

1.  We’ve gotta know whether that baby inside Grace is human, or something horrifying. Given the fact she was 100% dead when her body was “taken”, and Pepper told Dr. Arden she was full term (and we also saw she was ready to pop at any minute… possibly an unfortunate choice of words),  if a 100% normal, human baby is born and Grace’s life is saved, and if all involved get a happy ending, we’ll eat our laptops.

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Did the demon in Sister Mary Eunice finally bite off more than it could chew? What if SHE gets pregnant?

2. Sister Jude-arrgh, Judy Martin and Lana Winters are now both on the same side, and they have each been through a living hell (that neither even came close to deserving) and have more or less nothing to lose but their lives, they have potential to be a really entertaining, merciless, and shitbird again?

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3. Is Kit dead? Is Dr. Arden going to make it back in time to give him the Pulp-Fiction-style adrenaline shot? As I recall, once he dies, he only has a two to four-minute range before all the oxygen in his brain is depleted, then it’ll be too late to restart Kit and “reverse the effects” of the potassium chloride Dr. Nazi slammed into his heart. How is that  going to happen in time? It took Dr. Nazi a minute or so to get to the room with the returned Grace and Pepper. You think ANY person, let alone the morbidly curious sociopath who is conducting this little experiment (even if you factored out Pepper’s weird return) isn’t going to be thrown off and distracted after going to discover by the sudden appearance out of the blue of a patient whose corpse he saw himself and then being taken away by AN ALIEN, now nine months pregnant after two weeks of her death (tops), touch her full-term stomach , then go, “well, this was interesting, but I need to get back to what I was doing with that patient I don’t give two shits about. Hold that thought, we’ll talk later”?

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4. The chance that we could get to see either Oliver Thredson or Dr. Nazi get what they deserve, hell, maybe even both of them (we can dream, can’t we?) At this point, if Dr. Nazi was dragged to death under/behind a bus and it went on for twenty minutes before he stopped screaming for help before his head came off, that wouldn’t be enough. Nope, we want Dr. Arden/Gruper to get she Shelley treatment, as slowly and painfully as possible while everyone in the hospital laughs heartily at and makes fun of his unnaturally tiny endowment.  Don’t let him die in a comfortable bed at the hands of a mercy killer, either, kick him down a flight of stairs, then drop him off in a giant pile of his victims.  And  Thredson/Bloody Face? Seeing him being eaten alive by wolves (seen the movie Frozen?  Then you know the exact horrible death, possibly the most blood-curdling death in the movie, we are referring to) is too good for him that misogynistic psychopath! No, nothing less than seeing Thredson dying at the hands of Lana Winters will make us satisfied enough to say, “OK, I think they just may be even now” Nothing so quick as having his throat “slit nice and easy” and bleeding out, either, they should spread it out over at least the length of time Lana was tortured emotionally, psychologically, and physically at his hands. What, about…pffft… two-three weeks now she’s been in hell? Four? Start the clock at the stomach-turning “aversion-conversion therapy”.  He should get put through what he did to Lana, or in his own personal, scary hell.  I’m all for Lana and Kit grabbing a few tools and a textbook or two and skinning him alive …and Wendy not really being dead (don’t ask how, we’ve accidentally just slipped into wish-fulfillment mode here) and coming back to join in would be the icing on that cake.

We realize the content above might make you think we’re too harsh, or make you remind yourself never to piss us off, but a little birdie came to Horror Boom HQ and told us what [redacted for spoilers] to our favorite characters who have already been through more pain and horror than most people are put through in a lifetime. You’ll be right there with us.

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5.  Pepper is doing something horrible to Dr. Arden-Gruper to avenge what he did to Shelley (as Murphy promised in a tweet quite a few weeks back) could quite actually happen.  Hey, she’s ‘come back’ with not only a normal IQ, but a high one. Maybe she’s got the skills to give him exactly what he did to Shelley (and then toss him out in the woods to be ripped into confetti by the pissed-off, hungry raspers he created).

6. Finding out what happened to Ian McShane’s character after he escaped. It’s supposed to be short but sweet.

7.  Discovering the ‘tip of the hat’ (McDermott and Murphy have been hinting around about this ) to Ben Harmon, the character McDermott played in Season one. I can think of at least one that would just BLOW the top of everyone’s head off, but I’m sure it’ll be something different.

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8. Seeing whatever happens in these scenes *shown in quick flashes) from the preview for “The Name Game” (Episode ten)  screen-capped below. Man, that red slip is getting a lot of air time this season!

9. The especially weird dream sequence coming up (or psychosis playing out in someone’s head) that Murphy said consists of Sister Judy dressing in a Dusty Springfield-type mid-60s time period outfit, singing “The Name Game.” Who could have guessed that Lana-Banana nickname in the first few episodes was foreshadowing?

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10. Seeing Dylan McDermott as Bloody Face Jr more. McDermott (whom I sometimes wonder if Ryan Murphy gets nervous about, since he’s not exactly 007 when it comes to discussing the plot and upcoming developments) said next, his character and the surrounding Bloody Face Jr. storyline) going to delve deeply into his “Mommy issues”.  You know, saying Bloody Face has “Mommy issues” is sorta the equivalent of saying Charles Manson, Tex Watson, and the rest of his Helter Skelter crew were “somewhat off-kilter mentally” and/or had been known to be “involved with mild recreational drug use from time to time”.

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And finally, here’s the preview for “The Name Game,”  Episode Ten. Enjoy! If we get more info before the episode airs, you’ll know right after we do. Looks like things are going to get ugly even uglier…

Ten Shamelessly Twisted Things We Learned From American Horror Story Asylum Episode 9, “The Coat Hanger” (SPOILERS)

Well, hot damn!

OK, let’s get the following suspicions we had that were confirmed out of the way briefly before we get our serious learn on here . 1. Yes, there is a connection between the aliens showing up and Kit having sex. So far they’ve taken Alma and Grace, and Kit got the tracking device. 2. Lana’s pregnant, alright, and.  3. Dylan McDermott is the son of Bloody Face, Oliver Thredson, and that was him killing pretty much the entire cast of the wrap-around story so far. Which leads us to…

1.  We learned Johnny Thredson’s back-story (which is a lot like many of us predicted …so far). This is coming from Bloody Face Jr. (who will be referred to as “BFJr” when we’re pressed for time), and sociopaths have been known to be pretty good liars (and Ryan Murphy has, too, though only when it’s to throw fans off a scent, not because he’s a sociopath). Here’s what we learned about his back story, broken down, from the cold open… he says, “I wanna stop. I really do..”

  • BF Jr. has had ‘impulses’ ever since he was a kid. The way he described what the impulses and how amazing they made him feel when he acted on them, the therapist thought (before he got to the part about skinning a cat) he was talking about compulsive masturbation. I’m no prude, but that’s just sick.
  • He started out by skinning a dead cat. Then he realized killing them felt even better.*
  • He grew up in foster care. His foster family kicked them out “when they saw the evidence”.
  • He got bounced from foster care house to house, until he figured out how to do it without getting caught. He said he hadn’t “harmed” any animals since he was a teenager.
  • Then he went to prison for armed robbery, where he learned killing small animals is a precursor to psychopathy. That got him thinking what made him the way he was, and who were his real parents?
  • Johnny found out who his real parents where when he started looking it upon the internet that they had “in the joint”.
  • After he found out who he was, those impulses got stronger and harder to control, especially certain thoughts. First they told him to retrace his roots.
  • Now he’s back in the house where his father lived  (not sure how he afforded such an awesome mid-century modern house, I’m pretty sure he’s living there in, let’s say, a non-traditional way, such as killing the owners and occupants and disposing of their bodies)
  • The thoughts and impulses started telling him to hurt women. Not just hurt them, skin them. Like the cats.
  • He got frustrated because he ‘made a mess’ when he tried it (as we see a flashback of him trying to skin Theresa in broken-down Briarcliff, and getting pissed because she was screaming, and yelling at her to shut up and stop moving-“This is delicate work!”). He knew he botched the job because he didn’t have the same medical training and skills as his father.
  • He wants to stop skinning/killing until he can get into medical school (“If it’s not too late”). He wants to learn to do it as well as his father did. And only then he reveals to the now-terrified therapist that his father was …Bloody Face.

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2.  We learned that Sister Mary Demon is dee-lighted  to share the news with Lana that she’s pregnant, and that she is NOT getting rid of the kid via a “Drano Margarita” (you don’t want details). Sister Mary Demon tells Lana she WILL have this baby. “This is an insane asylum. People hump like bunnies here, you’re hardly our first unwed mother. Of course, the babies are  born a little…cuckoo”. Later, when she tells Lana the coat-hanger abortion (gah!) was unsuccessful, Sister Mary Eunice simply glows with nasty glee.

I don’t trust anyone… or anything.

 

 

3. Lana Winters has wised up, and turns out to be a very good actress when she needs to be. She tells Sister Mary she must have hallucinated the rape, and when she politely informs Sister Mary Demon that she can’t have this baby, threatening to put her in restraints for nine months if that’s what it took, she played along. Lana has also figured out that Sister Mary Demon is an evil bitch (“You’re worse than Sister Jude… you’re a sadist”), but I don’t think she has any idea—yet— she’s actually demonically possessed. Unfortunately, Sister Mary fucks with her anyway by the end of the episode (more on that later)… but Lana makes VERY effective use of her time until then.

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4. We learned Lana really, really  wants to kill Bloody Face. Like, immediately. This is, I think, the second time Kit has had to talk her out of it and remind her if she kills him now,  not only will Kit take the fall, but Dr, Thredson will never take the blame. Though I think if Kit wasn’t involved, odds are even she would have killed him as slowly as possible without getting busted,  then gotten rid of his body effectively,  probably chopping him into 400 pieces, just for sheer payback. Luckily, she now has leverage on him, can get some payback by making him suffer WHILE getting evidence she and Kit need to prove he’s the real Bloody Face, then kill him (that last part doesn’t work out… yet. “I need Thredson to talk”. Lana gets an idea… a great  one.

 

And I know something else… it’s a boy.

 

 

5. We learned how to really hit Bloody Face where it hurts. Go find him where you tied him up in some deep dark catacomb of the basement (where apparently only giving him enough the minimum amount of food and water to keep him alive) prove he got you pregnant, then threaten to get rid of the baby. First let him think you’ll have it, then give the baby away and brought up in foster care, LIKE HIM.

After some begging, she tells him she’s  getting rid of it, and since she’s stuck here, “I’m gonna have to get creative”, and pulls out a sharp, thick wire coat hanger, and takes her panties off.  “This is a mercy killing, Oliver. No child should ever have to grow up knowing his Daddy was Bloody Face.” (check). Oliver gets very desperate and apologetic, very suddenly. “You owe me this, It’s my child too, please.” In a clever twist, she tells him he’s a sociopath (check) and can never be honest with anybody (check). When he says he’ll prove it, she asks him why he killed each of the women, adding up to a very honest confession. Then she reveals Kit’s been out of sight with the suitcase-sized reel-to-reel recorder –the same one he got Kit’s “confession” on, ha-HAH — the whole time!  Oliver goes back into misogynistic blurt-mode again, calls her a bitch, and that he knows it was all an act. Not so. In perhaps the cruelest act she can think of to hurt him (which you’ll get NO complaints from us about), she tells him she was pregnant all right, but she already used the coat-hanger on his “beloved baby …last night” (we see the wince-inducing flashback).  “It started as a trickle…and within an hour, it was just a bloody mess.”

After they do knife count, I’m gonna pocket one. Then I’m going to come back tonight and slit your throat nice and easy. I always wanted to know what it was like inside the mind of a killer. Now I know.

 

6. Ryan Murphy, and Lily Rabe, have mentioned before that Sister Mary Demon actually has a plan and a goal . Tonight we found out what it was. She tells Timothy that she agrees with what Sister Jude told her- he should  be the pope. Not only that,  she wants to save souls with him, and serve him… alongside him… all the way to the Vatican in Rome. Oh, shit.

I don’t mind telling you …I’m pretty scared.

 

7. Speaking of Father Timothy, we found out how shitty what he is capable of.  Either Dr. Nazi must have some serious additional dirt on him, or nothing will get in the way of his ambition to eventually become Pope, or some combination of the two. The Monsignor took away everything sister Jude had left—her freedom, her safety, and her title as a nun. They even gave all her possessions, including her clothes, to the poor.  “Now you’re just plain Judy Martin”. (We’re going to have to get used to calling her that). Worse,  he knew what he was doing to her was about the cruelest fate possible. Worst of all, he knew it was a cover-up and she was innocent. Thus, we patiently, hopefully waited through the episode for Leigh to turn on him violently.  We’re sure we don’t need to explain why wretched Sister Jude earned that “Goddamned cigarette” from Lana, if you’ve seen the episode.  He appears to try to feel better about himself by “save” Leigh Emerson’s “soul.” Yep, the convicted, confessed killer of nineteen people (20 if the guy whose face he bit a big chunk off of died). Oh hey, here’s something Timothy  learned the hard way, up next…

Lana:  My God, what did they do to you?
Jude: Nothing I didn’t do to you.

 

8. If a psychotic killer, and possibly rapist,  who you saw bite a guard’s face off a year ago and knock a guard off a ladder and smash the sharp tree-topping ornament in his face recently, does a complete 180 and proclaims piously that he wants to be forgiven by God and make up for all the damage he caused… well, maybe wait, I don’t know, at least a week or so, before trusting him enough to unlock his shackles and leg irons, be alone with him in a chapel, and perform a baptism in a basin about the size of a hot-tub. Otherwise, you may wake up (after being drowned into unconsciousness) nailed to a cross and wishing you were dead so strongly that the actual Angel of Death hears you …and comes calling.

This is going to hurt.

 

9. Now that Dr. Nazi has seen it and has scientific evidence (he saw it and  has the claw print he made), he believes Kit about the aliens. “They’re experimenting. Probably refining  some form of eugenics,” he tells Kit after questioning him (not via torture, but in his office over a “friendly” bottle of fine scotch and a smoke) about having sex with Alma—and Grace— before she was taken. Ryan Murphy teased this info as a hint about what the aliens wanted in the first place, and their interest/connection with Kit;  now he’s confirmed it: Eugenics. But of course, being a “man of science”, he wants to attempt to bring the aliens back-by almost  killing him. This is where the completely batshit things that happen in the episode as Ken Tucker teased before it aired really kick into high gear.

YIPES!!!

This was in the official preview for “The Coat Hanger”, yet nowhere to be found in the episode. We included it because it was so disturbing (it better show up at some point in the next four episodes). See “Stray Thoughts” for more on this.

10. When Kit’s heart stops (so, we suppose a main character did technically die in the episode, though he’ll probably be brought back…we hope), the aliens start putting on their show—the usually ear-splitting noises and flashing, then almost blinding lights. Stunned, Dr. Nazi wan towards the source of a light, and enters a cell/room only to discover PEPPER returned (the aliens took her too, Murphy confirmed, and she came back ”different”),  SPEAKING NORMALLY AND CALMLY,  informing Dr. Nazi that  “The baby’s full term, it won’t be long.” What… the… ffffuu–  Dr. Nazi seems to barely notice Pepper (still a pinhead, but she doesn’t act like one, just looks like one), he’s too busy being blown away by the sight of a now-returned Grace- nude, glowing with life, and very, very pregnant.

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Judy: Yeah, things are gonna change around here. (gets up and destroys “Dominique” record with her bare hands)
Lana:  (impressed)  Well… hot damn.

*Now, see THIS is when the therapist should have kept a poker face but quietly excused herself for “just one second”, then as soon as she was out of Johnny’s eyesight, sprinted out of the building and down the street to safety. Don’t wait until he starts talking about how hard it is to skin a woman alive before you start to panic.

Stray Thoughts:

 

  • I guess we could discuss the themes of forgiveness in the episode; who deserves it and who doesn’t, and how being told by someone they’ve forgiven you is not always positive.  Instead, we’d rather talk about the juicier stuff, and leave it at this:  Telling someone that their sins have been forgiven does not always end well for you, either (see Father Timothy). I think the only type of forgiveness that was positive and from the heart (and very satisfying for us to watch) occurred during the scene in the day room with Sister Jude  Judy Martin and Lana Winters. Lana is sitting there looking the most bitter we’ve ever seen her, Sist Judy enters to the strains of Dominique, looking self-conscious at the her former co-worker’s stares and smirks but trying to maintain her dignity. She starts by sitting down at the table with Lana and says she doesn’t expect her to forgive her, but honestly tells her that what she did to her was wrong—and agrees when Lana adds it was criminal.  When Lana admits that she doesn’t trust anyone, or anything, Sister Jude gets up and yanks the needle off the “Dominique” record- VVVVOOOOP!  and many of the inmates react with applause and even some cheers (so did we).
  • Did anyone else think that Jude was going to keep a sharp vinyl shard and stab or slice someone who had it coming, like within the next minute or so of the scene, instead of returning to the table with Lana (or at least slip a shard into her pocket)? Well, she might have it stashed away. It could show up later…
  • Ian McShane, we’re glad you were back, and we’re sorry to see you escape  (though at least now that the holidays are over, maybe McShane’s character won’t murder or rape anyone else). Hey, maybe he decided to exit via the woods, with the hungry Raspers. You think YOU can bite a face off, Leigh Emerson?? Think you might have met your match, there. Murphy has said that we’ll find out —probably on the finale— what happened to him, or where he went, just for closure. I don’t think McShane will get any more screen time. Sister Jude oops, Jude,  dammit— was terrified to see him approaching her bedside, but kept eye contact and did a fairly good job of not showing her fear, though she couldn’t hide her disgust.
  • There were lots of great lines in the episode, and McShane got one of the funniest. He’s being strapped down in an isolation room for some sort of sexual misconduct (that I hope was consensual, but he’s not exactly Don Draper and if a nun was going to say the hell with it and sleep with a patient, there’s a few slightly more appealing choices—not many, but still)  and Sister Jude, hate in her eyes, says to make it tight. “Oh yeah, I like ‘em tight! Just ask Sister Chastity.” Jude snaps that she will deal with Sister Chastity herself and Leigh replies, “You might wanna start by giving her a new name!” She slaps his face, but you can tell he thought it was worth it.
  • We’re really  concerned that the only evidence (and the only copy) of Dr. Thredson/Bloody Face’s confession is hidden away in the hydrotherapy room. We just hope to God that both Kit and Lana were in on the hiding place. Then again, if Sister Mary Demon has her way, they’re probably both fucked on many levels.
  • We were positive–from the moment the still photos were released– that the cigarette Dr. Nazi gave to Kit was going to be laced with Sativa (so he’d hallucinate and Dr. Nazi would work it into some evil plan)- because his little greenhouse isn’t just a hobby. You can’t just go into store and buy Belladonna /Deadly Nightshade, either, even back in the 60s. If you have no idea what Sativa is, you can read about it here (and on a ton of other BLTC type websites out there, probably).
  • Is Sister Mary forcing Lana to have her baby because she knows what a monster the baby is going to become, or just out of sheer spite because she knows how evil it is to make a gay woman who was raped by a serial killer (who also killed her lover) and got pregnant from the rape have to live with it in her body for nine months and then go through childbirth to have it? We’re guessing a bit of both.
  • I don’t know how much time was supposed to have passed, I’m assuming a few days or so, but Leigh sure healed quickly after Sister Jude jammed that sharp metal letter opener into his neck. He appeared none the worse for wear, other than a gauze bandage wrapped around his neck. Maybe Dr. Hans Gruper, who proved he can actually save a life if he really applies himself, gave him some stitches and antibiotics— after all, Dr. Nazi was in on the “frame-up” of Sister Jude.
  • Anyone else notice there were shots in the preview that were not in the actual episode?  That includes the one above, the one of Sister Mary Demon with someone (I think it was Lana) miming a sarcastic Oh, boo-hoo!   directed at them, and we didn’t see THIS disturbing one either. And we really, REALLY looked for it, too:
Not in "The Coat Hanger", but in the preview for it. Where would it even go?

Not in “The Coat Hanger”, but in the preview for it. All we know is it BETTER damn well show up later! We already got screwed with all the AHS S1 DVD/Blu-ray; Murphy describes all kind of cool shit on the commentary, then says, “we had to cut it out, but I’m sure it’ll be a special feature on the deleted scenes/out-takes on this DVD, you can watch it there.” NO we fuckin’ CAN’T! Because there’s no deleted/extended scenes, or even out-takes in the special features on the whole set! At the very least, tell us where the above was supposed to go. Cross your fingers with us that this and the one above comes up later in the next four episodes…

  • We can’t fucking wait for the last four episodes (starting January 2nd, 2013), and  really  can’t wait to see  the two toughest cookies in the joint: Judy Martin and Lana Winters- team up. Of all the (human) women in there, they’re the ones whose good side I’d try to stay on (or join up with). This should be very, very good.

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We Have Confirmation On Who Dylan McDermott Plays On American Horror Story Asylum, PLUS The Photo To Prove It! (Spoilers, Obviously)

We hope we’re not too late to the party on this, but oh boy, do we EVER have confirmation —and a photo! The photo below is from American Horror Story Season One, AKA American Horror Story: Murder House, but you can bet your ass there’s a photo in this article of Dylan McDermott more or less in costume (just without the home-made face mask). Better than the one I put in the Featured Image, since I purposely used a grainy, slightly overexposed one in the interest of spoilers.

But wait, there’s more! Ryan Murphy confirms it, but says we won’t find out what he wants, why he’s there, or what his agenda is until Episode Nine next week, titled… wait for it… THE COAT HANGER.

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“I really wanted Dylan to play a sexy, no-education, dirty, drug-addict, grifter. And there you have it.”
-Ryan Murphy (click here for interview)

 

 

Well, OK then! The current theory, which we’re jumping on the bandwagon with as of this writing, is that Dr. Thredson got Lana Winters pregnant while he was raping her. I guess that doesn’t make it legitimate rape to certain shit-for-brains members of the GOP who have such ignorance as far as the reproductive system that I’m surprised he figured out how to have sex with himself,  let alone another person …and I’m going to get WAY too worked up here remembering all that crazy bullshit, so back to American Horror Story Asylum, where things make a little more sense. Anyway, I wonder if she realizes she’s pregnant at Briarcliff, and the only way she can deal with it is a coat-hanger the title of that episode. However, I think Lana’s smart enough to know that would kill her if she tried it, but I doubt she’d raise the baby– I’m thinking she gives birth to it and then puts the baby boy up for adoption, and he ends up in a series of foster homes growing up, until he discovers one way or another who his father was and what he did. Maybe Lana DOES end up Bloody Face/Oliver Thredson’s “story”, and achieves journalistic success doing it. If that’s the case, I hope she writes a book on it and gets a fucking Pulitzer Prize for journalism.

Today is my first day back on American Horror Story. Fasten your seat belts & get your air-sickness bags ready. It’s time to party! (Tweet from McDermott on 11/2)

 

 

Let’s face it, there aren’t going to be many happy endings for these characters, and Lana has gone through such a series of nightmares and gates of Hell, I want a happy ending for her.  Those “imposters” that modern-day Bloody Face killed are probably part of some extremist cult fan-club (kind of like in A Horrible Way To Die,  a horror film not without some flaws, but I totally bought the premise of a Facebook “fan page” or just a blog that got totally fucking out of hand). Time will tell, though I wish there were sixteen more episodes of the season instead of six (soon to be five after the Christmas episode, “Unholy Night,” airs in a little over 24 hours).Looks like the modern-day Bloody Face is sporting plenty of ink on his arms. I don’t think they’re McDermott’s actual tats, so if the son of Bloody Face picked them out, I really want to see how sick they are!

Ten Dark Things We Learned From American Horror Story Asylum, Episode Six – The Origins Of Monstrosity (Spoilers)

Where does this evil come from? Could she have been born that way? -Jenny’s mother

 

Yep, Ryan Murphy was right, that probably was “the darkest episode yet.” Glad Sister Mary Eunice was around to lighten the mood a little. We found out all kinds of horrible things, so speaking of the most entertaining demon-possessed nun in television history so far, let’s kick things off with this…

…and don’t tell me what to say, and don’t tell me what to do…

1. We learned that Sister Mary Eunice, who sure was having a great time throughout the episode (the only character that wasn’t wretched, unless you count Dr. Thredson’s extreme mood swings, if you include a few happy, delusional moments he had in the episode) looooooves  spreading evil outside Briarcliff as well as within. Despite Jenny’s mother’s desperate query to Sister Jude quoted in the header above, I’m pretty sure that sociopathic little girl was born twisted. She scared the shit out of me, and usually little spooky kids don’t creep me out that much (unless something supernatural is involved. We didn’t get much deep back story other than the fact that she had never cried, but what was she, eight?  Cute plaid dress, Bad Seed  pigtails, Fun Time coloring book, emotionless eyes and flat voice, already keeping trophies… and her brother and sister were fine. Notice I used the past tense? That’s because (thanks to Sister Mary Eunice’s encouragement), by the end of the episode it was revealed Jenny had slit both her sibling’s throats …and stabbed her mother with the giant butcher knife from the kitchen at Briarcliff. Take a wild guess as to who gave her the knife. Sister knows budding evil when she sees it, and I’m pretty sure Jenny was born that way, with “the gift of authentic impulse,” as Sister described it warmly to her. She wasn’t raised by a wire monkey mother.  I’ve studied enough abnormal psychology and true crime cases to know of some killers who, after they were caught and convicted, confessed to either a journalistic or researcher and said various versions of whatever’s wrong with me, I was born with it. Nothing happened, it was just already in me.  Jenny also taught us that in some cases, monstrosity is born, not made.

Administrator: I should warn you… the sight of her is quite shocking.
Monsignor Timothy: We’re all God’s creatures.

 

2. RIP, Shelley.

At least she got to spend her last days in a private room with clean sheets. I was thinking, huh, wonder what this new development going to be?  when we saw an establishing shot of Monsignor Timothy and the man who had reached out to him for last rites walking across some sort of upscale lobby we’d never seen before. [side note: What was that place? A hospital? A hotel? It looked much more sterile and nicer than Briarcliff, anyway]. The other man– let’s call him the administrator– said they weren’t able to identify her . Oh no. Once he mentioned TB to Timothy, I knew who was waiting for her last rites.  She looked so much worse than we saw her last week (the fact that the guy who escorted him up was really eager to give Timothy privacy, and couldn’t really look at his patient, still didn’t prepare us)  that I was very worried he wouldn’t be able to identify Shelley, especially since she was point the point of speech, but Timothy did.  He looked genuinely upset and hurt when he recognized her. There was nothing left of the vivacious young woman we met early on, who told us she was only there because her husband decked her and had her committed to Briarcliff after he caught her cheating (in a threesome with two sailors, granted, but that doesn’t excuse him having her locked away and discarded), who pointed out that men loved sex too and no-one called them  whores, the girl with the lusty grin who we first met in the premiere when she sprang up and gleefully told Sister Jude, “You could shave me bald as a cueball and I’d still be the hottest tamale in this joint!” after Sister had shaved off a chunk of her hair. Though we didn’t see it, the Monsignor put her out of her misery as quickly and as painlessly as he could, weeping quietly (it looked to like he strangled her with his rosary), then made the sign of the cross. Speaking of that rosary…

3. In what was maybe my favorite transition in the episode, we next saw him entering Dr. Arden’s quarters,  looking as genuinely pissed as we’ve seen him so far when he saw Dr. Arden looking out at the view and happily humming, then Monsignor winged  that same rosary at Dr. Arden’s record player (sound of needle being scratched off– vvvvvvvuuuup!)  and called him on his shit. When he saw what Dr. Nazi had done to Spivey (who got caught beating off watching Sister Mary Eunice bathing languidly while humming Jesus Loves Me;  Dr. Nazi didn’t buy Spivey’s story that she’d invited him to watch her “flash her pussy” through that peephole, but we sure did), and didn’t buy Nazi’s rationale, he announced he was turning him in. Dr. Nazi then announced that Timothy had just as much to lose if everything ‘came to light’, and so we learned  Dr. Arden has indeed been blackmailing him. I guess they didn’t do a full reveal/flashback about why yet, but it’s obviously something the Catholic church would not approve of. So that leaves out altar boys, since judging from recent media reports, the Vatican seems to have an open-door policy on that. I’m guessing he’s a sex addict.


4. Speaking of Dr. Arden’s research, as has been theorized here and on quite a few other horror sites, he was trying to create a “immune-boosting vaccine” –sort of– to make sure the human race could survive after WW3 (or so he says; I suspect he’s a power freak with a God-complex and sure as hell doesn’t mind inflicting pain, but he doesn’t admit to that)  after the devastation of the nuclear holocaust that he assumes will immediately kick off.  “I am not a monster! I am a visionary!” he angrily responds to Timothy’s allegations.  Sure, whatever. “Witness the next stage of human evolution.” He cut Shelley’s legs off to punish her for not wanting to have sex with him, then (worse) for laughing at his tiny junk, and he sure  as hell knew he wasn’t doing her any favors conducting experiments on her. No-one else is buying it, especially not Timothy …but he’s being blackmailed.

“You’re smarter than they are. Don’t you ever forget it.”

 

5. We learned Dr. Nazi is not the only one doing some blackmailing. This time, Dr. Gruper (the exact spelling according to closed-captions) is catching instead of pitching!  Sister Mary Eunice, who pretended to be Sister Jude on the phone (doing her voice perfectly), then paid a little visit to Sam Goodman. “Did Sister Jude send you?” “She doesn’t know I’m here”, and got a less-than-friendly look on her face right before the cutaway to commercial. When Sister Jude visits him to deliver Dr. Ardren’s fingerprint and finds the door not only unlocked but slightly ajar, Guess who she finds on the bathroom floor in a pool of his own blood.  However, with his dying breaths, he manages to gasp to Sister Jude Arden didn’t do this… it was a nun.

THEN…

Sister Mary Eunice grabbed all the evidence, and paid “Hans” a visit.  By the way, when she pointedly calls him by his real first name, he seriously loses his shit, but only makes himself look worse when his defensive reaction degenerates into racial slurs. When he asks her if that’s all of it, Sister Mary Eunice smiles sweetly (for a demon) and cheerfully tells him no, not everything, she kept some evidence in case he tried to “double cross” her.  Showing a rare, momentary lack of delusion and narcissism, Dr. Nazi asks her why she’s protecting him and what she wants. “You’re not in love with me. I’m no fool. I know I’m too old …too ugly.”  This is when we find out Sister Eunice definitely has a master plan (besides giving murderous sociopathic little girls a giant weapon and making sure she gives them a push in the right, or  what the devil would consider “right”— direction). When she tells Dr. Arden the two of them would make the start of a new era as long as he entrusted his soul to her, Dr. Nazi’s eyes showed a flicker of real uncertainty and even some fear for the first time since we met him. Good.  Even though it scares us too…

…No monster starts off that way. He was somebody’s precious baby, crying for his mommy.

 

6. Kit is onto Dr. Thredson. He used his one phone call to call him, and knows he fucked him over, and grows furious because he was confused about his story, but now isn’t any longer, because he knows (after Grace told him as he was being dragged out of Briarcliff). Alma is alive. Or at least that, as far as we know, he didn’t kill her. Dr. Thredson was calmly condescending at first, but unravels when Kit calls him a liar, then ends up yelling back at Kit just as loud when he calls him a bastard, and slams down the phone, ending the call. What the hell is Kit going to do now?

7.  Ah yes, we learned a lot about Dr. Thredson. Some of which we wish we sort of didn’t (that ‘breast feeding’ was at least as creepy as the aversion-conversion therapy he gave Lana in Briarcliff)! His birth mother, who he says he never knew, abandoned him to an orphanage (as Lana puts it) where they gave him food, water, very basic education, and learning the difference between right and wrong with the help ‘of a leather strap.’  He stresses how much he misses a mother’s touch, especially skin-to-skin contact. Warm skin. If you’re wondering about the Harlow study with the wire-monkey mothers and want to read more, here’s a good place to start, but I’m warning you it’s a heart-breaker. The two classes in college I took that covered it are enough info for me, and I remember everyone– sorority girls, frat-guys that I usually tried to sit as far away from as possible because they were such douchebags–just kind of trudging sadly out of the lecture hall afterwards (especially the one that showed slides).

Would you care to see what your benevolence has produced?

 

8. We then learned that Dr. Thredson had a revelation when he was going to medical school. In gross (REALLY gross) anatomy class, they wheeled in a 33-year old woman’s corpse  (about the same age as his mother when he abandoned her)  into the ‘operating theater’ for students. He came back later when he could have some privacy to get up close and personal with the cadaver, but knew he needed someone a little more lively… “warm living skin” as he put it. Then he calls Lana …Mommy.

9. In quite possibly the best, most clever reveal in the episode, we learn out where Dr. Thredson saw Lana before—AND why he chose her to “tell his story”. Zach Quinto, Sarah Paulson, and Ryan Murphy all cryptically said after last week’s reveal that we’d find out they’d “been in the same room” before he met her in Briarcliff. She was there to cover the story about Bloody Face being apprehended and taken to Briarcliff for psychiatric evaluation. Remember how she was there in that slo-mo scene in the premiere when they brought Kit Walker out of a car and up the steps of Briarcliff in shackles? Thredson (who we learned last week had good reason to be there: his agenda of covering his ass by framing someone) eavesdropped on Lana—the only female there— talking with her fellow journalists . When a sexist male reporter asks why she’s there covering the crime beat, Lana asks him if he thinks Upton Sinclair waits to be assigned a story. Unfortunately for her, Thredson overhears the following…

Lana: I’m making this my story.
Sarcastic Douche: Oh, a woman’s touch, huh?
Lana: Yes, exactly. That’s what’s been missing from this story. You think this mook’s just a monster, but no monster starts off that way. He was somebody’s precious baby, crying for his mommy.

Precious baby crying for his mommy…  a woman’s touch… that particularly resonated with Bloody Face. Survival checklist when dealing with Oliver Thredson: Don’t make him feel abandoned. Don’t call him a liar or a bastard.  Don’t get in his way. Don’t remind him of his mother, or any mother, except as a complete last resort to avoid being skinned alive.  But what about present day Bloody Face?

Sticking your arm through a metal  slot to take a photo of the inside of Bloody Face’s cell because your new wife offered to blow you if you did it: Bad Idea, or Big Mistake?

10. Aaaand we learned that the wrap-around story is back, making slightly less sense—but definitely ratcheting up the action. It starts with the cops showing up after a 911 call from a cold, flat voice that sounded very Dr. Thredson-esque (but turned out to be an actor we’d heard would be returning from Season One new role, but the same actor) and told them they needed to send a car to Briarcliff. “I’ve been a busy boy,” he says, and informs them “they were imposters”.  One of the cops on the scene realizes something has dripped onto his forehead from above (never a good sign), wipes it away to see the wet stuff is red, looks up, and curses a blue streak. The three Bloody Face “imposters” are still in costume, but suspended from the very high ceiling of what used to be Briarcliff. Not hung by their neck, mind you, but sort of wrapped in wire, or ropes in poses that I’m sure many will compare to the poor guard in Silence of The Lambs,  but evoked Hellraiser  a little more to us at Horror Boom.

You’ll know my name when you see them…

 

We close with cops searching the building and finding Leo with his arm ripped off. When a mobile phone rings, they follow the sound into the cell with the slot that Leo stuck his arm into to try to take a photo after his classy bride offered to blow him if he did it, and the cell phone is still in his hand… ringing.  When a frustrated cop answers, the voice cameo is back, and they also realize Leo’s bride is missing. The last thing we see is Theresa, wounded but not dead yet, strapped to Dr. Arden’s table—with a pretty authentic-looking Bloody Face looming over her. So, though we’re left with more questions than answers, we DO learn that Leo is dead, and that pretty soon, Theresa is going to probably wish that she was.

 Sister Jude (from the Season Premiere): All monsters are human.

Stray Thoughts:

  • Is it just me, or does Joseph Fienne’s English accent sort of come and go? I’ve gotten used to Grace’s French accent slipping slightly sometimes, but I’ll forgive it if it isn’t intentionally written in.
  • Sister Mary Eunice has the devil inside, but her entertainment factor went through the roof  throughout this episode (guess they needed some comic relief in this very dark episode where  several characters we are rooting for got very, very bad news indeed. The scene of her singing along with Lesley Gore’s “You Don’t Own Me”, (hit this link to hear it) while twirling around in Sister Jude’s “trashy red lingerie” (and Sister Jude’s former quarters) and hurling her rosary off her neck and at the cross sexily was fucking gold,  every second.
  • Plus, the horror fan in me LOVED Sister Demon’s B-story with dead-eyed little Jenny. Those  two sure hit it off, unfortunately for her family. I wasn’t shocked she’d killed again, but I sure as hell didn’t expect her ENTIRE FAMILY to be the victims. Of course, she was telling the same story to the cops (as calmly as if she was ordering lunch), and I think that’ll be the last of her, because they bought it.
  • Warning: BIG cranky rant ahead. Skip the block of text if you want to don’t want to read it.  NOW can certain ‘horror fans’ or writers who have no business recapping a horror story stop referring to the mutants/raspers as zombies? Jesus H. Christ! I know you fellow horror nerdists are with me on this. I get pissed when I hear people call 28 Days Later  and [REC]  and [REC2]  “zombie movies”. Especially [REC2],  where the whole point is the reveal, during the FIRST ACT of the movie, that it’s a demonic possession that’s contagious. This is beyond stupid. Were the raspers dead at one point? Did they then rise from the dead to eat the brains of the living, who then turn into zombies?  I’m going to have to change the subject now, I’m getting all worked up just thinking about it. It’s one thing with viewers, it’s another for TV reviewers who are being paid to write a weekly review and/or recap.  All I managed to communicate back was a reply directed at the author, asking, “What about them makes you think they’re zombies?” Zilch, zero, no reply, I’m sure they’re too lazy busy to read it, but if everything you see that looks messed up is either a zombie or an alien,  at the very least you shouldn’t be assigned to cover anything more complicated than The Walking Dead. If that. COME ON! Really? Zombies? That the best you got? Sheesh.
  • Frances Conroy is back next week, with a black dye job and what looks like wings. YEAH!  All Murphy will say (for now) is that she plays “the ultimate angel”, and judging from the preview, I think she’ll be the one to get the cruelly ousted Sister Jude back to Briarcliff. I hope to hell someone does!
  • God, like things aren’t hellish enough for Lana, she has at least a good fifteen seconds where she wakes up in her own bed, including bed sheets and a pillow that smells like home and maybe even her soul mate Wendy, with her own nightstand, and you can almost hear her thinking, Oh, here I am in our bed… what a horrible nightmare. Thank God it was just a drea —  then she hears Dr. Thredson’s voice, sees that it’s her bed NOT her bedroom, instead she’s in a tiled basement with a shackle around her ankle, realizes she’s still in hell and lets out a prolonged, anguished scream of grief and horror.  It’s supposed to get WAY worse in episodes 8 and 9?  That  alarms me.
  • So… what exactly was in those croque-monsuier sandwiches? The crunching and chewing sound seemed deliberately amplified to the point where I was waiting for Dr. T to tell her after she finished, “Oh, about where I put Wendy? Well, we just put part of her someone no-one would find it, that’s for su—” (Lana pukes everywhere)
  • Please, no more surrogate breast-feeding with Lana and Bloody-Face. We get why it was needed as far as exposition and character. I’m also glad she talked him out of killing her by being smart enough to know exactly what the freak needed to hear from her (he was weeping when he was preparing to skin her, before and after the flashback). I don’t like the whole “adult baby” way this is going, for one thing, but there’s other reasons why …that… just… NO.

    Frances Conroy will be back for Episode 7 next week! She sure as hell isn’t playing Moira this season…

I just found the synopsis it for next week’s episode, “Dark Cousins,”  and Frances Conroy is credited as “Dark Angel”. Synopsis: Sister Mary Eunice is terrified to discover a dark angel has descended on Briarcliff.  Kit makes a bold move to be reunited with Grace.  Another synopsis I read said pretty much the same thing, but worded it: Sister Mary senses an evil presence at Briarcliff.  Does that mean there’s something that scares Sister Mary Eunice because it’s a threat to her evil …or something even scarier than what jumped into Sister Mary Eunice? We sure as hell can’t wait to find out!

See the preview below, looks like we’ll get more of Grace, who is looking the worse for wear (plus, Dr. Arden giving her an injection does not bode well for her health) and see Sister Mary Eunice shows Dr. Nazi who’s boss!

 

The Plot Thickens! American Horror Story Asylum: Dylan McDermott Tweets From Set; Three Theories About His Character – IDT (Spoiler-ish)

There aren’t really any spoilers in here. There’s speculation, but it’s all over the place. There are only spoilers if you haven’t seen the first four episodes of American Horror Story Asylum (or any of Season One of American Horror Story, and plan to .

My favorite part of the piece is the content of the tweet from Dylan McDermott:

“On the set of ‘American Horror Story.’ I promise you will be thoroughly fucking satisfied.”

Gratuitous shorts of Dylan McDermott shirtless because, well, why not? The guy said he had to get a personal trainer, he’s pushing 50 and had to work harder for it, so everyone wins by showing it off here.

Now THAT’S all we needed to hear!

Click on the below link to read the piece from International Digital Times:

‘American Horror Story’ Season 2 Spoilers: Dylan McDermott Tweets From ‘Asylum’ Set; 3 Theories About His Character – International Digital Times.

I really dig this image from the preview for “I Am Anne Frank Part Two.” Enter the lab…