Ten Reasons We’re REALLY Psyched Up For The American Horror Story Asylum Christmas Episode Airing This Week!

So, the Christmas episode Horror Boom has been looking forward to ever since we saw the title of it about a month ago airs Wednesday, December 5th on FX. We’re psyched for it for plenty of reasons, in fact, we have no trouble coming up with ten of them, almost off the top of our heads! Plus, we have a gallery of some great episode photos, too.

1. The title of the episode is “Unholy Night”.

2. The fact that one of our favorite actors, Ian McShane is not only a guest star, he’s an EVIL guest star who dresses up like Santa (I almost typed “Satan”, wonder if a character will bring up the fact those two words are easy to confuse when spelling).

Screen shot 2012-12-03 at 11.21.43 PM

Perhaps you recall Al Swearengen (who turned out to be the most likeable character on Deadwood, and everyone loved him by the end of season one – I’m working on a few T-Shirts with his quotes). If not, here’s a little clip reel to show you what he’s capable of (not for the easily offended, though if you’re already reading this, we doubt that). If you’re as big of a Deadwood fan as we are, you’ll love it either way.

3. In an awesome interview we posted a few weeks ago (from vulture.com) with Lily Rabe, she said some REALLY exciting things about the episode. First, she spilled that Sister Mary Eunice teams up with Ian McShane to do a bunch of holiday-themed evil shit together.


4. THEN Lily Rabe went into more detail,  and it just got better:   “She  [Sister Mary Eunice] has a lot of Christmas spirit, that’s for sure. That was one of my favorite ones to shoot, actually. Ian and I got to do some really evil things together, and I have to say it was a career highlight. He’s such a wonderful man. We had great stuff in the common room, with all of those background actors, the inmates. I can say Christmas will never be the same for me after shooting that episode. I’ll never look at a Christmas tree the same way.”

Screen shot 2012-12-03 at 10.58.08 PM
5. This official episode description that’s now been updated to the following: A murderous Santa wreaks havoc on Briarcliff. Sister Jude faces off with the Devil. Arden has a shocking encounter in the Death Chute.  That’s pretty goddamned great already, but from the hints Ryan Murphy has dropped (it’s been confirmed Pepper the Pinhead will be back) I predict (and really, really hope) Pepper is going to show up in the Death Chute, since that’s kind of the secret entrance/exit of Briarcliff when Dr. Arden is there, and take revenge for Shelley that Ryan teased. Hmm, maybe a sharp object will be handy for her to slice HIS ears off?

6.  Exhibit A:  This photo that Ryan Murphy tweeted several weeks ago, from on set:

Screen shot 2012-12-04 at 12.29.47 AM

7. The fact that last week, Ryan Murphy promised to deliver, in his words, “The most fucked-up Christmas episode of all time.” WE ARE SO THERE! According to Murphy in the same interview, McShane’s character was “victimized so badly in prison that he made a psychotic break and decides he’s Santa Claus and he knows who’s been naughty and who’s been nice.”


Oh, so cannot WAIT to find out what horrible thing is inside that present!

8. The fact that he also  said she (maybe McShane will help her make the ‘ornaments’, or provide them)  will be decorating a tree. “Think of how the devil would decorate a Christmas tree,” he teased. We’re hoping it’s going to be something like the below still (from the Black Christmas remake, 2006). Just put some human inner organs on there, festoon it with some intestines, we’re good. Then he confirmed (in the EW.com interview here) what Lilly Rabe said earlier: Yeah, next week has my favorite [as far as] Lily Rabe’s character does,  where she decorates the Christmas tree. It’s sort of like, Well, how would the devil decorate a Christmas tree? So that’s just a laugh riot. And we love Murphy’s sense of humor!

This shot and the opening scene of the Black Christmas remake (2006) made it worth a watch for me.

This shot and the opening scene of the Black Christmas remake (2006) made it worth a watch for me.

9.  Exhibit B: The below HD preview of the episode, “Unholy Night”:

10. Exhibit C: The official American Horror Story Asylum Christmas/Holiday greeting card below that hit the press today:



Ten Ways To Kill Time Till American Horror Story: Asylum Premieres Tonight at 10:00 PM!

Well, if you’re anything like me, it’s pretty hard not to count down the hours till the Season Premiere of American Horror Story: Asylum  (AKA American Horror Story Season Two – Season One was self-contained)* tonight –that’s Wednesday, October 17th –on FX!  Let’s see, as of this writing, that’s… OK… about sixteen hours from now! The “countdown” clock I set with my Word Press widget doesn’t count down the hours in a timely manner, but at least it has the day right.  Also, if you’re anything like me, you’ve read everything you could find and watched everything you could. I’ll try to vary my suggestions so at least SOMETHING on this list is new for you, to make the time pass faster.


1. Watch the First Five Minutes (including new credit sequence) – embedded in this earlier post here.

2.  Did you see Season One? Do you have any idea of how twisted– and fun– American Horror Story can get? Here’s a suggestion:  stay semi-spoiler-free and just look into the back story of one Dr. Charles Montgomery (and his wife Nora, though his story alone shows the most freaky showmanship), who actually built the “Murder House” for his family in 1922 with the money he made being a ‘surgeon to the stars’. It didn’t take long for tragedy on a shocking level and for horrible event to pile upon even more horrible event, until the final reveal knocked it out of the fucking park for we horror fans.  I remember going insane every week, because it took quite a few episodes until you found out the complete back story of the doctor and his heartbroken wife. In fact, all the pieces didn’t fit into place 100% (back-story-wise) until the penultimate episode (and his last appearance on the show) “Birth”.  I would figure his story was over, then just when I thought the surprises were done with, the role he played in the notorious, unsolved, haunting real-life case The Black Dahlia was revealed. The doctor and his wife produced an offspring that was… well… read the well-written, comprehensive summary of the whole Montgomery family on the American Horror Story Wikia here.  Note: if you plan on watching Season One, but haven’t yet, and want to go into that season 100% clean, skip this! If you’re worried that American Horror Story is too fun sick, twisted, and shocking for you, this should steer you in the right (or wrong) direction.

“Have you made an appointment for a procedure?”

3. If you haven’t yet, click here to take the unsettling admittance test to see if you qualify to be admitted to Briarcliff Hospital on this site that FX put together. Hint: there are no answers you can give to avoid being committed. This was actually part of a contest FX ran for the show; FX partnered with GMR Marketing, an agency that specializes in “experiential” marketing (more on that later).  I ended up deciding I was too much of a pussy to go through with the contest–I’m pretty sure if I really got creative and applied myself, I had a decent shot. The “exam” is still there, though.  It shouldn’t take you long (and will give you a different psychiatric diagnosis almost every time – I think I went six times. OK, seven counting tonight. This time it was Diagnosis: Acute Existential Disorder With Undifferentiated Dyssomnia. What… the.. fuu–

Uhhhh… Yeah, I decided not to take this test after all, so I’ll be going–hey, why are all the doors locked? Help! HEY!

4.  Read my post (not as spoiler-ish for Season One) of  Twenty of the Best Quotes From American Horror Story Season One.  I’m pretty sure it’ll do the trick!

5. Watch the below video where a patient viewer edited together every single one of those creepy-ass teasers for this season– there’s about twenty, maybe more–after they finally ran the final one (including the longer trailers).  That’ll kill five minutes, and you’ll see a couple that they didn’t show on TV because the were too extreme. I remember kicking back with my husband, watching Louie calmly, and the one with the “raspers” rushing through the trees making my heart rate skyrocket. I remember starting to say, “I think this might be a new promo for– fuck! 

6. Couldn’t really see much during the opening credits for American Horror Story: Asylum (not that they aren’t scary as shit either way)? I put together this slideshow (for which I do NOT claim any ownership or copyright for, this is just for entertainment)that consists  of over 100 of the most disturbing new title credits images/stills in this recent post – check it out here!

Bloody Face, I presume?

7. There’s a PDF document that looks to be for press (though said to be for fans). Either way, it’s TOTALLY worth a download and is packed with information to read. It’s titled “Fan Guide “and you can find it here on the official site under “Downloads”

8.  Read my piece “10 Reasons We’re So Psyched** for American Horror Story” via this link –  I’m pretty sure you’re sold on it already, but if not? This should do the trick!

9. There’s a recent promo that’s closer to a trailer, this time. You can watch an extended, blood-curdling version of  the trailer titled “Atheist” below!

10. I suggest checking out the official American Horror Story: Asylum You Tube channel.  It has the longest “behind the scenes” selection of “Inside the Asylum” footage.  See it below…

So, those are my suggestions. The only thing left to do is buckle up, because when this roller coaster that is American Horror Story jumps the tracks, you’re in for a hell of a ride!


*Which pissed a lot of people off.

** See what I did there? Oh how very clever of me.