That’s a relief. Looks like we’re getting straight to the action! Buckle up kids, this is gonna be zombie carnage on a scale never seen before. We’re talking GLOBAL amounts of gore and evisceration that…
Er, don’t forget that this movie is, itself, ALSO single-mindedly bent on achieving worldwide saturation.
Huh? Why would that matter…
The ZOMBIE HORDE arrives!!
LIMBS and SEVERED HEADS and BLOOD and ENTRAILS fly in all directions asThere is lots of censor-friendly SCREAMING and RUNNING AROUND in a SUITABLE FOR MASS MARKET fashion!
I see your point. Well, an undead plague sanitized for international consumption is still an undead plague, I guess. Let’s go!!
They corral an RV and make a GETAWAY, but one of the DAUGHTERS
turns out to have been BITTEN, forcing BRAD to make an unthinkable choice while raising the emotional stakes to intense heights ofhas an ASTHMA ATTACK! They park outside a PHARMACY.
-From the Abridged Script By Alex Wiebe
This script explains why we’re maybe not going to even bother renting the movie when it comes out… and also, we laughed our asses off. Click on the big red link below to read it!
- The Editing Room Finally Takes On “Mama” – Read The Hilarious Abridged Script Now! (horrorboom.com)
- Evil Dead: The Abridged Script – Another Horror Flick We Hoped The Editing Room Would Parody! (horrorboom.com)
- The Editing Room Burns ‘Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters’ At The Stake! (horrorboom.com)
- Skyfall: The Abridged Script (the-editing-room.com)