The Millenium Bug- Trailer of the Week

I’ll have to add to the this post later, since I have plans I’m already running late on, but this looks AWESOME.  What looks like a movie that might just be hillbilly torture-porn turns into a creature-feature PACKED with gore, and? AND! No CGI.

More coming up, but I’ll be doing whatever I can afford to do to help this fun indie get released. “Whatever I can afford”  is less than a dollar, so I guess I’ll just have to spread the word.

If anyone remotely connected with the movie is reading this, NEVER GIVE UP on getting a release of this on DVD. Please. It’ll happen. If there’s anything I can do to help that does not involve money, drop me a line. I can’t wait to see your movie …and I know I’m not alone!

There’s several “behind the scenes” featurettes on YouTube (they have their own channel) and I was forced to quit on a couple just because there were too many spoiler-y shots. Here’s one that doesn’t give away as much, while also being proudly claimed to be a  RED BAND (NSFW) featurette. Wish I could watch all of them, but I don’t want too much given away–especially because there seem to be some REAL jaw-droppers.*  I discovered The Millenium Bug when I was doing a Google image search for “inbred movie gore FX” this week and a very attention-getting gore shot from the movie came up in the results. Once I started reading about it, I got my mind off how rabid I am so see Inbred. Now I’m jones-ing for both of them! Here’s that NSFW featurette (consider yourself warned, those of you trying to eat and/or easily offended).  How they got this insanely off-the-hook beautiful actress to look as unattractive as she did in the movie is proof enough of their makeup FX skills right off the bat! Check it out.

And you can get the best, most up-to-date news from the goodie-packed official Millenium Bug website. Just wish I’d seen the IndieGogo information before the time ran out! If I saw the below crowdfunding video, I would have been getting my credit card out two minutes in**. You had me at “No CGI” and “The original version of The Thing”

If anyone remotely connected with the movie is reading this, NEVER GIVE UP on getting a release of this on DVD. Please. It’ll happen. If there’s anything I can do to help that does not involve money, drop me a line. I can’t wait to see your movie …and I know I’m not alone!

*I meant to connect to an image on their website of a ripped-off segment of a face,  including a jaw, but that’s not the way the gallery is set up. The whole gallery is great, though, and worth checking out!

**Don’t worry, Rick. Not going to happen!

What the fuck is this? I'm really asking.

Dude, What The… Anyone Recognize This?

 

Have you ever been doing some housekeeping on your computer, then run across an image that not only do you not recall downloading, but that you cannot identify at all?

Does this help? No?

Well, I am pretty certain that this shot is in fact from a horror movie. Possible a gooey sci-fi/horror hybrid. I can’t tell what the hell it is, though. I am going to guess… um… that it isn’t human, due to what I believe is a long tooth poking out, but then again, I can’t even find the face. If it IS a face. Could be a shattered mangled accident victim’s limb, but I doubt it. Dead body? Monster? Dead body of a monster? Your guess is as good as mine.

Does looking at a smaller version help? No? Damn.

I’m usually good at identifying images from horror films, but this one? No clue.  Your guess is as good as mine. Ay takers, please comment below! Hell, I’ll even take wild guesses at this point.

Check out the “featured image” above and take a stab at it (as Your Old Pal The Crypt Keeper would say)!

 

NSFW Red Band Trailer of the Day – The Man With The Iron Fists

Well, I tried to embed this, but I think the fact that IGN has you verify you’re over 18 before you can access the trailer has something to do with it. I was prepared to think this was lame, but it REALLY looks like fun in a Kill Bill Vol. One kind of way.  Too much fun not to share!

You can watch the debut trailer for The Man With The Iron Fists  with this here link.

They put the F-U back in Kung Fu. I want that tagline on a T-shirt!

Ring AKA Ringu (the Japanese Original) 1998

Well, Mrs. Horror Boom has had a pretty unpleasant cold the past few days, and when I woke up today the bug must be “peaking” because I could barely drag my ass out of bed long enough to grab some Tylenol, over-the-counter cold tablets, and a couple bottles of  water, then crawled back into my bed. Felt a little better after the cold medicine started working, but still could barely shuffle around the house, coughing and feeling sorry for myself. I coughed so much today I sound like “Big Ange” (no, I don’t watch ‘Mob Wives’, or most reality shows*, but I’ve seen clips from the on E!’s The Soup “Reality Show Clip Time!”, reminding me why I never watch them). At this rate I’ll sound like The Crypt Keeper next, which I can deal with as long as it goes away in 48 hours, but I REALLY need the symptoms to lessen and go away by Friday. I had a brief burst of energy an hour ago, but felt too shitty and slow-witted to write anything new. Bleh!

Good news is, I found a review I wrote for Ringu (“the original movie that inspired/started it all”, the new ad copy loves to say). This was written before the US remake was even in the works (though it was rumored). It’s much more easy to find now. I still stand by my ‘sleep with the lights on’ high-scare rating, even though I will grudgingly (get it? har-de-har) admit the US remake w/Naomi Watts was better than the Japanese original. The ONLY remake, as far as I know, of an Asian horror movie that surpassed the original.  Again, that’s not to say Ringu is a boring candy-ass movie. Not at all, no no no. I do feel that people who went nuts over the remake (especially if they’re big fans of it) should watch the original. It has less blood (definitely took the ‘less is more’ approach when it came to gore/violence), and a lower budget,  but it still is frightening (and I prefer the show-stopping TV-crawl scene from Ringu, rather than The Ring; both chill me to the very bone, but nothing beats the first one).

Unfortunately for me, I read a review that gave away (more like blurted out with no spoiler warnings) the  now-iconic TV scene at the film’s climax, but it still made every hair on my body stand on end. Shit! I’m a grown woman who has seen some pretty hideous, frightening movies, but I still spent at least the last half of the movie curling up into a smaller and smaller ball and covering my eyes in parts.

My cold medicine is wearing off, so I’ll post this for you to enjoy. Keep in mind it was written over ten years ago, but again, I stand by the review. I re-watched it last year when someone bought me the whole “Ringu: Anthology of Terror” boxed set with a prequel and two (I think) sequels (one so boring, sorry to say, it lost me in the fist 20 minutes or so–different creative team).** It still holds up and I barely changed a word. Hopefully I will not wake up tomorrow feeling quite as shitty–especially since I have a busy weekend planned for once–and able t o give you more updates! Also, I’m almost positive this was my first official taste of J-Horror. I’m glad it was such a good one, because it opened my movie geek world up and into a whole new universe of scary, scary, very scary movies (and nightmares, even a couple of panic attacks).

ffffffffuuuuuck….

I heard a lot about this movie, and I also heard that 99% of the people who saw it say most often was that it scared the living shit out of them. In 2002, it was hard to track down in the US (I wondered if I’d have better luck just buying a used copy of the VCD on eBay than finding a video store that has it in stock) but worth it. Wonderful Scarecrow Video came through for me yet again; they didn’t have a DVD, but they had a strange mini-video disk they told me would work in my DVD player. Boom! It wasn’t available officially on VHS format at the time of this writing, which upon reflection, is probably wise due to the storyline. I don’t know if this is the scariest movie I’ve ever seen, but it’s definitely up there in my top 10. Also, it’s probably the movie in my top list of scariest movies with virtually no gore.

The plot centers on a reporter who investigates what could be a video tape with a ‘curse’ on it. Yeah, I know that sounds ludicrous, but the way the story is laid out, it doesn’t turn out that way, and I wasn’t seeing any humor at all in the idea. It starts with two teenage girls talking about the cursed VHS videotape, one telling the other a sort of urban legend (anything involving an urban legend scares the hell out of me right there-I think I heard too many of them at slumber parties as a kid and was permanently warped). Anyone who watches the tape, then gets a phone call (we never hear what the voice on the other end of the phone says exactly) telling them they will die in a week. So far, everyone who has seen it has died in exactly a week. And guess what? One of the girls saw it slightly less than a week ago! One dies, and the other goes incurably insane. One of the girls is the main character’s niece, so she and another journalist (who I think was her ex- the English subtitles on the copy I watched were pretty badly translated in parts, but you get the idea) have a week to track down the source and try to stop things before the next Sunday evening.

There’s plenty of big jolts and scares in the movie-times where I really jumped. That’s scary enough, but what’s more frightening is the creeping sense of dread you get as the movie goes on. It’s filled with extreme suspense as well; captions show the days counting down and their time they have left ticking away. The dread was the worst-there are quite a few very creepy images, such as those shown on the videotape itself. You have a horrible feeling you’re going to see something you really, really would rather not at any moment, but you can’t take your eyes off the screen. This is a good one to watch with the lights off, as I discovered, though I am very glad my husband was asleep on the couch next to me.

Younger viewers who only have seen those teen slasher pics or torture-porn and expect every horror movie to be exactly like that may just not get it. Either that, or they’ll realize what they’ve been missing…

There’s a scene towards the end where the two main characters must bail water out of an abandoned well in an area that is already dark and scary. One of them, of course, has to be lowered down into the well (which is somewhere you *really* don’t want them to go, but they have to, lives are at stake) to fill the bucket, send it aaaalllll the way back up the well to her friend via a rope pulley to have him dump it out, then wait for the bucket to slowly trundle back down. I actually had to wake my husband up to hold my hand only about 20 seconds into the scene. That sequence is wonderfully, flawlessly filmed and edited (probably not a picnic to shoot for the lead actress, or camera crew, either). We feel the nail-biting suspense when the clock is ticking for the characters to bail out the deep well as quickly as possible to find what they need to, but though you are rooting for them, you also REALLY begin to dread seeing what the bailed water is going to reveal at the bottom (it’s not going to be a basket of friendly kittens) and that is a hard trick to pull off.  It took everything I was made of at the time not to chicken out and mute the sound.

Unfortunately for me, I read a review that gave away (more like blurted out with no spoiler warnings) the  now-iconic TV scene at the film’s climax, but it still made every hair on my body stand on end. Shit! I’m a grown woman who has seen some pretty hideous, frightening movies, but I still spent at least the last half of the movie curling up into a smaller and smaller ball and covering my eyes in parts. The story-line is clever yet simple, with a couple of twists, the scenes are beautifully filmed, the cinematography is gorgeous, the editing and pacing are perfect, and the acting is also pretty impressive. The score is great-I had to keep lowering the sound during the movie because it was giving my cat (and me) the creeps so badly. It also says a lot  about the talent of the film-makers when a movie can actively frighten you without virtually any blood, gore, or the popular sudden-discovery-of-a-mangled-corpse effect.

I really can’t think of anything negative to say; this movie achieved exactly what it set out to do, and did it flawlessly. Younger viewers who only have seen those teen slasher pics or torture-porn and expect every horror movie to be exactly like that may just not get it. Either that, or they’ll realize what they’ve been missing. Viewers that get bored unless there’s not slam-bang action and over-the-top gore every other scene…I just feel sorry for them because they will probably get impatient and turn the movie off after 20 minutes and miss out. If you want that kind of movie, (not that there’s anything wrong with that) rent Laid to Rest or something instead. But if you don’t fall into either of the above categories, and enjoy a well-made, atmospheric movie while having the hell scared out of you slowly but surely, see Ringu.

Here’s the international trailer – I actually had to wait until daylight to search for, watch, and post. Uh …the temperature just seems to have dropped at least ten degrees in here…

*Though I really, really hope they bring back Monster Man for another season, and really wish “SyFy” (wow, thanks for dumbing that down for us, because you know how dense we SciFi fans are) would bring back Scare Tactics. I didn’t mind Scream Queens, either (no more Saw movies to cast the winner in, I guess). A couple of friends of mine recommend Project Runway. It’s mainly the ones on E!  and the like, with the vile fame whores, that really make me want to puke.

** I think they went too far into Sadako’s back story (I shut down with the sequels/prequels when I heard she turns out to be a hermaphrodite-maybe it’s a cultural difference, but that detail doesn’t really add intrigue for me) in the other movies in the franchise. The American remake of The Ring gave away about as much information as they could without deconstructing it to the point where it turns into a procedural instead of a horror movie.

Funny Thai Ghost Commercial

Another good ‘palate cleanser’ if you watch too many Thai ghost movies in a 48-hour period. Got a pretty clever tagline, too!

I love how they’re all moseying/floating around together at the end and it’s STILL not too scary! Oh, and if it’s Thailand, you KNOW there’s gonna be a tranny/she-male joke in there somewhere! So, which Thai ghost would you LEAST like to run into (before or after dark)? Check out the poll below and vote!

No way anything good can come from this symbol...

Authorities investigate lungs found on L.A. sidewa–wait, WHAT? (Edited Version)

Note: This piece is edited down from the original “uncut” post – if you want to read the original, longer, darker version, it’s posted here.
Even this shorter version is not only longer than most of my pieces (highest word count yet) it’s also the heaviest. It’s not meant as a kind of preachy manifesto; instead I woke up one day, thinking out of the blue about a video clip on Yahoo! News that reported on the newest, scariest drug on the streets  (it makes PCP look almost tame). Experts explained it was probably behind a rash of exceptionally disturbing, gruesome homicides.  The same clip also helpfully more or less told you how to find it on the internet and what it sold for, even adding that it isn’t branded as an illegal narcotic officially yet.

When you’re online, you read a Yahoo News story about bath salts. When you read a Yahoo News story about bath salts, they tell you how easy it is to score bath salts. When you score bath salts, you turn into a psychotic cannibal, get naked, and eat a homeless man’s face. Don’t get naked and eat a homeless man’s face. Call your local cable provider today.

I hoped the blood-curdling report and the clips showing what it’s reduced people to (I’ve never seen a man being arrested  on the news screaming in utter terror so long and so loud that he blew his voice out, and I’d like to compartmentalize it, but so far, no luck) scared most people away. Anyway, I saw that the lungs mentioned above and below hadn’t been identified yet, and that the coroner seemed a mite casual about the whole thing. “It seems odd,” one quote read, “that they didn’t have any other body parts attached to them” Yes, odd. I suppose you could call it that.   I tried to limit links to reference sites, and also be careful not to use links you just click on and walk into a buzzsaw of deeply disturbing info and photos.  I try to keep the vibes here at Horror Boom relatively positive; I want horror lovers to enjoy reading and visiting, and come back and have more fun –not to bum anyone out or ruin their day/night. I did several re-writes to do my best to ensure that.  OK, you have now been warned that the following post isn’t a non-stop feel-good jamboree. Oh, and I swear even more than usual. So there’s that. If you’d like to read the original, longer unrated director’s cut  extended version of this piece, which is also a shade or two darker, click here.  I worked hard on it, but the consensus was the first version was 30% longer than it needed to be, and could use some trimming. If you have a little extra time, you may want to read the long-ass version  after you read the “abridged version” contained below.

Well well, hasn’t the news been interesting lately! A little too fucking interesting than many of us would like, and you’re taking to a decades-long horror geek. Movies, novels, short stories, TV shows, comic books, whatever I can get my hands on that I know isn’t going to be shitty. The last several weeks, it seems like at least once a day, I read some headline I would glance at, move on and go about my business for a split-second, then say out loud, “Wait, WHAT?” after it registered.  Each time, I actually paused a minute before clicking on it, thinking: maybe this is information I don’t really need in my head. So far I’ve clicked on everything, though, unless there’s even a hint of animal abuse involved. In that case I put as much distance between myself and that information as quickly as possible; anyone reading this who has also practically sprained their fingers reaching for the remote to hastily change channels when one of those sad, sad, very sad ASPCA ads calling for donations pops up in a commercial break*.

Five or more years ago, if a friend pointed the crazy-ass headline above out to me, I would have burst into horrified laughter. Now, not so much. Maybe it has to do with turning forty, thirty-seven, maybe it’s due to me reading the headline five minutes or so after I woke up, or that I was home alone when I read it (instead of with a friend and some alcohol in me), but I sure as hell didn’t laugh. Nor did I see much humor in the situation when the whole Miami face-eating story first hit the news. When the next Real Time With Bill Maher aired and John Waters was on the panel, HE didn’t joke about it (though he didn’t take a crack at it in the first place), but I guess I’ll wait and see. I found it frightening. No, the first horror reference to leap to mind in association wasn’t YO, EPIC ZOMBIE APOCALIPS  is finally HERE, so fuckin’ strap in BIAYOTCH, WOOOOH YEAH!!!  like 90% of the article’s readers racing to be the first to post a comment with the “best” zombie joke. OK, the horror reference that came to mind for me right away was the comic series Crossed, but I didn’t celebrate it (and if you’re familiar with Crossed, you know if THAT shit ever did break loose, the last thing you’d do was celebrate)** .  Just disturbing as hell.  Each detail was more disturbing. The fact that it took a much larger amount of bullets than normal to take the guy down, the fact that the number of Facebook ‘likes’ had already reached the mid-five figures within hours of hitting the news (Click ‘thumbs up’! Classy way to show concern for a fellow human being.) The fact that victim and attacker were both naked and had no previous connection, the fact that the homeless man survived and was in the ICU even though his face was ‘gone from the beard up’,***  the fact that the killer growled at the cop when warned to stand down at gunpoint, that it took three shots to take down the attacker, the fact that a witness (the one I saw seemed excited and a little too enthusiastic that he might be on the nightly news) said he still had part of the face in his mouth at the same time and shook his head around like a dog.  This…  just… no. That was what my brain decided (to protect my mental health) right before it yanked my attention on to something else.


No-one’s actually said this to me yet, and I hope to God it never comes up. I don’t want anyone blurting out something along the lines of, Hey, come on, you’re like seriously into horror movies! How could you not totally love this? Uh, because I have enough common sense to know that movies are fiction? Because I’m well aware there’s already enough scary, batshit, depressing stuff going on in the world without me having to go out of my way to look for more to try to top it? Even though I can’t explain in one articulate, organized sentence (with less than twenty words, anyway)  what psychological need draws me in to the horror genre and keeps me there–I mean, six goddamn months and I’m still stalled at the stage of jotting down basic notes for the About section of this blog– I knew one thing for certain long before I was old enough to drink legally: it was all about escape.

Maybe I should back up a little.
I was reading about the exceptionally brutal, grisly murder of Chinese student Lin Jun a few days ago.  The piece of shit that stole Lin Jun’s life, as well as the lives of many small animals,  has a craving for attention and media fame that makes the media whore known as (sigh) The Octomom look classy in comparison.  So, I’d rather refer to the crime and the victim, the human being, the beloved man whose father, mother, sister and uncle had to fly from China for his remains –the collected parts of his body they’ve been able to recover thus far. His head is still missing at the time of this writing.. The only comment from the family released to the media so far is his mother’s heart-wrenching quote: We come to take you home now. She’s reportedly so devastated with grief and pain she can barely stand up.  You can look it up on Wikipedia, but I since I began this piece, I discovered that the Huffington Post had an exceptionally thoughtful article on remembering the victim, and not giving the killer the 15 minutes of fame he’s admitted motivated his crimes. I recommend it (unless you feel that any article about the crime is twisting you into emotional time-bomb), and it focuses more on the tragedy while deliberately keeping gruesome descriptions to a minimum. It does have a photo or two of the evil bastard posing for a head-shot (he seems to have a very high opinion of his looks, though he resembles a constipated weasel with at least one STD) and his mug shot. In both, the monster has the same dead, inhuman, dead eyes; lights on, nobody home. There’s a gallery you can click on, but I don’t know the contents, because I didn’t want to give the evil, toxic little piece of shit what he wants: any further attention.*****

Think twice before unlocking...
Deep breath. Anyway, when I was going through the comment section in one of the more graphic features –in which every once in a while, someone would have the motherfucking nerve to complain about the video being taken down and even offer to pay a few bucks through PayPal if anyone who had burned a copy could send them an email — a memory came to me.

Back in college, probably 1988 or 89, I was driving home after a night class. I turned a corner to discover that an area (of a few blocks) had been blocked off by the police, EMTs, and even a news van or two …with plenty of rubberneckers standing around. Being the responsible, mature undergrad that I was, I blew off studying, parked, and wandered over to see what had happened. One of my first thoughts was they were shooting a movie. Then I heard some middle-class white kids I’m guessing were ages 12-15 talking, complaining about not being able to see anything. I asked someone who looked official, but non-threatening, what had happened. She told me there was a homicide: a shooting. I backed off and didn’t ask any more.  It turned out that the kids were mad because a make-shift yellow tarp had been stretched out between two police cars, and now  they couldn’t see the body (oh, boo-fucking-hoo for them). Two women, probably about the age I am now, were pretty sick of hearing them complain. Clear as if it were last week, I remember one of them finally saying, “OK. Look, if you want to see a dead body so much, why don’t you go watch a Friday the 13th movie or something?” They all responded, almost in unison, “Yeah, but that’s fake. This is real!” I thought, OK,  just … just fuck this whole thing, walked back to my car, and went home.
Even back then, when I could act like a self-involved little bitch without realizing it, I didn’t want to see “real”. If I wanted to see someone’s head explode, I’d watch Scanners. I wanted to see a dead body (not that I was desperately wishing to), I had plenty of Italian slasher flicks on VHS that my good friend George, who had started his own rental place called Scarecrow Video, had recommended to me. If I wanted to be shocked (and feel slightly ashamed of myself for not turning off the TV) I could watch one of the uncut (rare at the time) Ilsa movies.


What’s my point?  I like to think everyone can tell the difference between a horror movie and real life. “It’s getting weird,” was one of the quotes from the L.A. Sheriff working on the case of the missing (or found, to be more accurate) pair of lungs. Good. Kind of an understatement, but still, good. That all this crazy shit is happening is bad enough but somehow it’s reassuring that at least people are pointing our how horrifying and exceptionally grisly these events are. Right now, when people walk down the street and seeing a pair of lungs on the sidewalk while they’re checking Facebook updates, they don’t just casually steer clear of them, then go back to their Blackberry.

I sometimes think of those bloodthirsty kids so excited to see ‘the real thing’ every time I’m reminded how easy it is to see ‘the real thing’ on the internet. If they never grew out of that phase (eek), they must be satisfied now. As it stands currently, if you have a computer and don’t care about whoever sees your browser history, and are semi-savvy about doing a search, within minutes you can watch horrifying drug cartel murders filmed and purposely leaked by Mexican drug lord’s henchman (AKA Narco Sicarios. Boom, just learned something), American contractors beheaded by batshit terrorists, and perhaps the most vile out there up until the Lin Jun murder, actual murder footage filmed by three bored, shitty rich kids in the Ukraine (dubbed the ‘Dnepropetrovsk Maniacs’ by the media). I don’t even want to go into the evil shit depicted in the video, and am glad to this day that I didn’t do more than read what the video consisted of. No wonder kids are growing up WAY faster than they did–well, than we were at that age.
I have found that fellow horror fans (especially ones from my generation) have two things in common when it comes to documented, borderline “snuff” media: 1. they/we cannot stomach and/or tolerate any animal abuse or harm in any form-most of us don’t even want to read or hear about it- and 2. they/we have no interest in seeing non-fictional footage of anyone killed on camera, whether it’s a someone being hit by a vehicle, a suicide, or worst of all, a homicide deliberately captured on film.
The response is almost always the same regardless of age, culture, or gender: No, I don’t need to see that.  We don’t need to watch a video of a fellow human being getting shot in the face during a robbery. We don’t need to see the graphic autopsy of a car-crash victim. You want to see an autopsy that’s intense, from what is agreed to be one of the best genre films ever? Just watch or re-watch John Carpenter’s The Thing. There’s at least two bizarre, nasty, absolutely unique , and really fucking awesome autopsies (performed on some THING, not some ONE) you’ll ever see, and there’s no danger they’ll take a tiny part of your soul with you when you watch them. You want to see something very bleak, depressing, graphic and brutal that one human does to another? We’ve already seen that in Martyrs, Inside, and A Serbian Film. You’re probably familiar with the kind of film you really only need to see once. They’re actually scary, because they’re horror movies that did exactly what they set out to do: horrify and disturb you. Two out of three of them–the French ones– gave me nightmares, even though I watched the ‘making of’ features and commentary for the purpose of trying to get a little emotional distance. You won’t exactly be feeling festive for a while after you see them, but at least you know, when it comes down to it,  they’re just movies. They aren’t reality. We’re smart enough to know the difference– and that’s the point I wanted to make.

Oh, fuck it, never mind...

Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go watch Deep Rising for probably the fifteenth time since I bought the DVD 10 years ago, featuring a REALLY fucking cool sea monster, plenty of giant tentacles with teeth, fun, slime and gore leading up to the final scene where you see the awesome Lovecraft-ian leviathan in all its glory. Check out the trailer below. Not exactly HD, but you don’t need it to see how fun it is.

I have a review, just not posted yet (plus IMDB edited it really heavily, so I’ll re-do it and post it, promise). By halfway through, you’ll agree that being eaten by ‘Jaws’ would be preferable any day over THIS thing making a meal of you. If you’ve seen the movie, you know exactly why, and will probably recall the first very memorable scene that reveals what happens if this monster gets hungry and you’ve there (“Oh God! It’s Billy!”).  As for the creature effects for the movie? I think this may have been one of the last films Rob Bottin, the genius responsible for the awesome monsters in John Carpenter’s The Thing, worked on, and the monster effects exceeded my high expectations. In my review, I proclaimed that it was the second best sea monster movie ever made, (#1 was and will probably always be Jaws). Between that review and now, I saw The Host (whose monster qualifies if you don’t count the fact that it’s easily able to dive out of the water and survive while crashing around on land, barreling directly towards humans to eat them-it likes to swim around, but unlike Jaws and Deep Rising, you’re not safe just because you’re not in the water or even in a small land-level building). So, Deep Rising remains in the top three on my list …no small feat! I’m happy to say I was lucky enough to see all three of them in the theater, back in the day when they still had cinemas consisting of one giant theater and one screen. Yes, only one movie could play at a time! I may change the subject when someone asks my age, but I’d rather be on the other side of forty and have had the varied rip-roaring, kick-ass movie-going experiences I did.
*the comedian Patrice O’Neal, who passed much too young in 2011, did a really funny routine about how much he hated seeing the ads. His specials are worth seeking out if you dig stand-up and aren’t easily offended (if Chris Rock’s HBO specials don’t offend you, this probably won’t). If you have Netflix, Patrice O’Neal – Elephant in the Room is available on streaming. Update: Hey! After I wrote this, but before I posted this, I found the clip with the whole routine about sad animal commercials. It’s bleeped, but just as funny. If you love animals and hate those ads, you’ll appreciate this. The embedded clip is on the fritz so for now, just click this link to watch the bit directly on You Tube.
Man, I really miss that big guy.
**Unless you were already infected and turned into one of the Crossed. If you don’t read it and aren’t familiar with it, you don’t want to know what the infected do for fun. Oh, OK. If you are feeling brave and want to skim the Wikipedia page on the Crossed series, it explains the premise ( just beware of plot spoilers).
***also disturbing: the fact that, like a complete fucking moron, I viewed a color photo confirming this …not to mention the additional disturbing fact that it only took me a few minutes to find that pic. Not my proudest moment,  and though I only looked at it for less than ten seconds (which seemed like ten minutes) I’ll probably be able to call it up MUCH too easily for years.
**** the Huff Post article gives this information, but I feel it’s worth repeating and spreading around: Various community efforts are being organized to help raise money for the devastated Lin family. It’s possible to donate to the Concordia University Chinese Students Association’s Jun Lin Rest in Peace Foundation at any RBC branch. To learn other ways to donate, contact Yan Shi at 514-848-2424.

New-Latest NSFW Trailer for Alex Chandon’s INBRED!

I’ve raved about this UK flick before (even though I haven’t seen it yet). I have yet to hear one negative thing about it, and I’ve been waiting since late 2011, so I’m even more excited when a new trailer comes out.

Whoa! Is that guy’s ENTIRE BRAIN missing along with the top of his head? That shot alone makes me want to see Inbred! It looks like right now, the film is still making the rounds on the festival circuit, where it has been consistently very well-received. Plus, the director is always friendly and helpful on the Facebook site for the movie. If you follow the link above to my previous post for the movie, there are plenty of fun links to places like the official Inbred site, and the FX house that did such a great job with the copious amount of gore.

On with the show!

Make a wish

Cinderella (South Korea, 2006) – This Ain’t No Fairy Tale

 

Make a wishI have a list of “Top Ten Scariest Asian Movies” on IMDB. Cinderella (2006, directed by Man-dae Bong), may have been the weakest in my list; then I saw the skin-crawling Thai movie Coming Soon and decided it had earned a place. So I ended up bumping Cinderella, but that doesn’t mean I don’t want to give this creepy Korean thriller its props. If you love K-Horror, this deserves a look. Yes, it has one or two elements that appear frequently in other Asian horror movies; the lead character finding out a horrible secret, a couple scary-ass ‘ghost girls’ that move/crab-crawl in a creepily unnatural manner, their long wet hair covering the dead white faces. In all fairness, I should point out that except in some extreme cases, I personally never get tired of this formula and the common images. Never gets any less scary, I cringe every time  I get the feeling one is about to pop out or swoop down. If I’m watching them after dark with all the lights off, sometimes I chicken out and hit ‘mute’ (but many times, still find myself sinking lower and lower, and in a couple of cases, peeking out from behind a pillow) . If you’re just completely goddamned sick of them and want something brand-new, perhaps you should give this one a pass. Either way, I advise watching the trailer for a good idea of the tone and art direction in the movie; there are few spoilers, which we horror fans always appreciate in a trailer.

Trust me, they had it coming!

The lead’s classmates are a bunch of mean-spirited little bitches! Trust me, they had this coming…

[30+ minutes of fruitless searching. on my Macbook Pro later] Guess what? I couldn’t find one subtitled in English! I had one carefully set away for this post, stored in more than one place, then boom, gone from my playlist.  Well, this way you’ll really be going in clean. Here’s. the poster art, thanks to our friends at Tartan Asia Extreme

Why the title? Don’t expect any glass slippers, but there is a connection. To tell you would be to give too much away, though…

I gave Cinderella seven out of ten stars rather than the nine to ten stars I traditionally give to perfect, borderline-soiling-yourself-in-utter-terror Asian horror masterpieces such as  Shutter and Shimizu’s Ju-on series. Cinderella begins with a hauntingly memorable pre-credits sequence. A dreamy image of slender candles being carefully lit on a child’s birthday cake; in the darkness, all you can see are what the warm candlelight reveals-a pair of female hands and the decorated cake. We see the hands gracefully lifting the cake and carrying it down a corridor, so dark that the cake nearly appears to be gently floating to its destination all on its own. Birthday candles on a cake, that’s a familiar, comforting, memory, right? The lilting music-box playing is… oh, I can’t do it justice right now, so just check out this teaser trailer (no English subtitles, but you’ll get the idea):

…and the fairy-tale spell is jarringly broken. That’s the kind of punch this movie is capable of packing. Some parts, especially the first act, suffer from pacing issues, dragging down the film (and viewer a bit). But get ready for the last act-it grabs your ankle like a cold

Yeah, I decided to go with the natural look after all.

Things I’ve Learned After it Was Too Late, Vol. 24: don’t work on the Cinderella gallery when you have a sinus infection that already hurts like hell.

hand from under your bed.  Through flashbacks, there’s a pretty classic, even Gothic, sick back story that stuck with me. There’s a couple hints, but it turns out to be way uglier (no pun intended-if you’ve seen the movie you’ll get the unintentional play on words) than anyone imagined. I also actually started talking back to the flat screen TV a couple times (if I’d seen it in a theater and said the same things at that volume, I would have been asked by an usher to calm down).  I’ve noticed that South Korean chillers like “A Tale of Two Sisters” or Korean crime-revenge thrillers like “I Saw the Devil” and “Memories of Murder” consistently get me so hooked in that (more than once) I almost blew off a deadline because I HAD to know what happened.

VERY bad sign after surgery in a K-horror movie

There’s no possible way that’s gonna end well…

I saw that many reviewers cited the movie for being ‘too melodramatic’ and ‘more like some soap opera’. I can see a base argument ( I guess) for ‘melodramatic’ ; fair enough, I suppose (though I personally don’t agree-how calm would you be if you walked in a room just as your daughter hanged herself –on her birthday?). However, a SOAP? Jesus, if so, I’d like to ask what the hell kind of fucked-up soaps YOU’VE been watching?*  Do they include images of someone trying to slice their own face into gory ribbons? The only thing on TV right now that is a ‘horror-drama’ and would even come close to this claim is American Horror Story. Actually, if you’re a big fan of the show AHS –like I am–you’ll probably enjoy this movie.

 I ended up giving it 7/10 rather than 10/10 for the following reasons: the lead character’s (who has at least graduated high school) mother doesn’t look a day over thirty. Tops. I know Asian women usually look fantastic for their age (Bai Ling was born in, I think, 1966 and still doesn’t have one line on her face) but here it’s sort of distracting (and kind of creepy if you do the math). The film suffered from some pacing issues as I mentioned above–it could have been tightened up by removing 10 minutes or so. Finally, the ending is too close to one of those, “uh…YOU decide how it ended!” types. With pretty solid storytelling throughout, it was slightly irritating to not have at least one major character’s fate resolved, instead of having the narrative just sort of flap away on slow wings. Yeah, Cinderella is no Tale of Two Sisters or The Eye (then again, nothing is) but if you’re looking for some Korean-style genre scares and a twist or two you didn’t see coming, there’s much worse ways (and much worse movies to watch, trust me) to spend 100 minutes. As long as you weren’t really planning on sleeping like a log that night…

Never mind, I'll come back later when you're in a better mood.

Bad body language for an Asian horror film…

*Well, Nip/Tuck did get messed up enough to have sponsors pull advertising towards the end, but that’d probably fall under FX Drama, not ‘night-time soap’. Oh hey–AHS is from the creators of Nip/Tuck. Suddenly, now it makes sense. I can’t believe I didn’t make the connection until now. I have a piece I wrote coming up called, “Ten F-cked Up Things That Happen on Nip/Tuck”, and it practically wrote itself, it could easily be twenty and I wouldn’t have to shake the tree at all.

This Ain't No Fairy Tale

 

Authorities investigate lungs found on L.A. sidewa–wait, WHAT? (Original Uncut Version)

Note: This is not only longer than most of my pieces (highest word count yet) but it’s also the heaviest. It’s not meant as a kind of preachy manifesto; instead I woke up, thinking about a video clip on Yahoo! News that reported on the newest, scariest drug on the streets  (it makes PCP look kind of quaint). Experts explained it was probably behind a rash of exceptionally disturbing, gruesome homicides.  The clip also helpfully more or less told you how to find it on the internet and what it sold for, plus that it isn’t branded as an illegal narcotic officially yet. I hoped the report–the clips showing what it’s reduced people to (I watched, frozen, as the news report quickly turned into a scene from a found-footage horror movie when it took at least three huge cops to cuff one white kid and wrestle him into the back of a cop car: though his face was blurred out, you could see his mouth open unnaturally wide as he began to scream and roar like a character possessed by a demon during a failed exorcism)   –scared most people away. Anyway, I saw that the lungs mentioned above and below hadn’t been identified yet, and that the coroner seemed rather blase about the whole thing. “It seems odd,” one quote read, “that they didn’t have any other body parts attached to them” (yes, I suppose you could call it that). I meant to write a shorter, lighter piece, but it turned into this. I tried to include direct links only to reference sites, instead of a link you just click on and get a gut-punch of material that even I found offensive. If my links aren’t enough and you do decide to scour the internet for more info or photos of any of the events I refer to, don’t do it if you’re feeling even a little off-kilter. You CAN look at that hellish visual documentation, obviously, I’m in no position to judge you. I try to keep the vibe here at  Horror Boom relatively positive; I want horror fans to enjoy reading and visiting, and come back and have more fun –not to bum anyone out. I did several re-writes to do my best to ensure that.  OK, you have now been warned that the following post isn’t a non-stop feel-good jamboree, and about seeing photos or discovering information you wish you hadn’t. Oh, and I swear even more than usual. So there’s that.

Well well, hasn’t the news been interesting lately! A little more interesting that several of us would like, and you’re taking to a decades-long horror geek. Movies, novels, short stories, TV shows, comic books, whatever I can get my hands on that I know isn’t going to be shitty. The last few weeks, it seems like at least once day I read some headline I glance at, move on and go about my business for a split-second, then say out loud, “Wait, WHAT?” and actually paused a minute before clicking on it, thinking:  maybe this is information I don’t really need. So far I’ve clicked on everything, though, unless there’s even a hint of animal abuse involved. In that case I put as much distance between myself and that information as quickly as possible; anyone reading this who has also practically sprained their fingers reaching for the remote to hastily change channels when one of those sad, sad, very sad ASPCA ads calling for donations pops up in a commercial break*.

Five or more years ago, if a friend pointed the crazy-ass headline above out to me, it would have sent me into gales of horrified laughter. Now, not as much. Maybe it has to do with turning forty, maybe it’s due to me reading the headline five minutes or so after I woke up, or that I was home alone when I read it instead of with a friend and some alcohol in me, but I sure as hell didn’t laugh. I also didn’t see any humor in the situation when the whole Miami face-eating story first hit the news. I found it frightening. No, the first thing to leap to mind in association with wasn’t YO, EPIC ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE  now f-ckin’ finally HERE, BEE_YOTCH, WHOOO YEAH!** like 90% of the article’s readers racing to be the first to post a comment with the best zombie joke (though in the interest of full disclosure, the horror reference that came to mind for me right away was the comic series Crossed).  Just disturbing as hell.  Each detail was more disturbing. The fact that it took a much larger amount of bullets than normal to take the guy down, the fact that the number of Facebook ‘likes’ had already reached the mid-five figures (thumbs up! Classy), the fact that they were both naked and had no previous connection, the fact that the homeless man survived and was in the ICU even though his face was ‘gone from the beard up’,***  the fact that the killer growled at the cop when the cop warned him to stand down at gunpoint, that a witness said he still had part of the face in his mouth at the same time and shook his head around like a dog.  This…  just… no. That was what my brain decided before it moved my attention on to something else to protect my mental health.

Well well, hasn’t the news been interesting lately! A little TOO interesting! You’re taking to a decades-long horror geek (with no shame in admitting it, and no apologies). The last few weeks, it seems like at least once a day I read some headline I glance at, move on and go about my business for a split-second, then say out loud, “Wait, WHAT?”

No-one’s actually said this to me yet, probably because the friends and family members that know me well enough to know how much I dig horror are kind, intelligent people, but I really hope there’s no chance of some idiot online (not anyone reading this blog, of course), or someone who I just met will bring it up–especially to my face when I have a drink in my hand I might be tempted to toss. I don’t want them blurting out something along the lines of, Hey, come on, you’re like seriously into horror movies! How could you not totally love this? Uh, because I have enough common sense to know that movies are fiction? Because I’m well aware there’s already enough scary, batshit, depressing stuff going on in the world without me having to go out of my way to look for more to try to top it? Even though I can’t explain in one articulate, organized sentence (with less than twenty words, anyway)  what psychologically draws me in to the horror genre and keeps me there–Jesus, I’m still jotting down basic notes for the About section of this blog– I knew one thing for certain long before I was old enough to drink legally: it was all about escape.

Maybe I should back up a little.

I was reading about the exceptionally brutal, grisly murder of Chinese student Lin Jun a few days ago.  Recent details emerging consistently state that the soul-less piece of…of… there’s not a nasty enough word in the English language I can think of right now to call the killer, so I’ll have to go with ‘the monster’ who took the life of Mr. Jun –and countless animals– did it for the possibly the most skin-crawling motive: a craving for attention and media fame in a way that makes the media whore referred to (bletcch)as The Octomom look almost tasteful.  So, I’d rather refer to the crime and the victim, the human being, the beloved man whose loving and father, mother, sister and uncle – had to fly from China for his remains, the collected parts of his body they’ve been able to recover thus far. They still have not found his head. The only comment from the family released to the media so far is his mother’s heart-wrenching quote: We come to take you home now. She’s also reportedly in so much grief and pain she can barely stand.

Since I began this piece, I discovered Huffington Post has a thoughtful article you can read discussing this very aspect of the whole media frenzy surrounding the case that enrages me the most: this monster, who everyone surveyed heartily agrees should suffer and be executed as fast as possible, wants: as much attention and media coverage as he can get. I recommend it (unless you feel that any article about the crime is twisting you into emotional time-bomb), and it focuses more on the tragedy while deliberately keeping gruesome descriptions to a minimum (I don’t know whether or not that’s the case for the several ‘related links’ given, though). It does have a photo or two of the evil bastard posing for a head-shot (he seems to have a very high opinion of his looks, though he resembles a constipated weasel with at least one STD) and his mug shot. In both, the monster has the same dead, inhuman, cold eyes. Lights on, nobody home. There’s a gallery you can click on, but I don’t know the contents, because I didn’t want to give the little shit what he wants: any further attention. I don’t recommend the gallery for the same reason.****

So, I’d rather refer to the crime and not give the monster who did it what he wants: any attention. When I was going through the comment section –in which every once in a while, someone would have the motherfucking nerve to complain about the video being taken down and how they couldn’t see it–  a memory came to me.

Continue reading

Normally I try to keep things on topic (though I *do* discuss Spartacus quite a bit), but am making an exception in this case. Wish I could donate as much as they need to finish the film. -Mrs.HB